NFC South Preview: A Shameful End to a Project We're All Sick Of

GM,

I think we both know it's no coincidence that we saved the NFC South for last in our NFL preview: We're each going to have to research the Buccaneers in order to write a single intelligent or knowledgeable word about them. Well, you will. Luckily, I ran into a Tampa Bay fan over the weekend, and he confirmed my suspicion that it's virtually impossible for the Bucs to win the division, make the playoffs, make a run of any kind, or even play spoiler. They won't even be bad enough to be interesting. This year's Tampa team should be about as memorable as John Rocker's stint with the Devil Rays. It happened, sure, but no one's better off for knowing it.

Those familiar with gamblers' way of thinking have this division being the most competitive, with the Saints having the best odds (2:1) and the Bucs having the worst (4:1). Carolina and Atlanta are each at 5:2. In the South, it's all about trust, though, meaning I'm picking the Panthers, a well-coached squad that's never a league punching bag, to be hosting a playoff game in January.

Atlanta has a strong running game with Michael Turner, an underrated play-maker in wideout Roddie White, a Hall-of-Fame tight end addition in Tony Gonzalez, and a so-far reliable quarterback in Matt Ryan. The Falcons also have a below-average defense and a historical inability to manufacture consecutive winning seasons. I don't trust 'em.

New Orleans should score 500 points this season. The Saints have way too many weapons on offense, and the defense might even improve with Darren Sharper on the field and Gregg Williams on the sideline. But take it from a guy who used to live where a lot of Saints fans dwell:

DO NOT TRUST THIS TEAM!

- JW

JW,

I formed my impressions of NFL teams back in the early nineties when I first started watching football regularly. Because the Saints sucked in those days, their success has always been something of a novelty to me. It's something you don't see every day, and as a result it's intriguing. I like to see them do well. I'd love to see them in the playoffs or even the Super Bowl. Among guys my age, I doubt that I'm alone.

Sadly, much of the Saints' strategy over the past few years has been based on a serious miscalculation. Just as the Atlanta Falcons and Tennessee Titans learned that you can't win a championship with a "mobile" black quarterback who throws poorly, so New Orleans will one day have to admit that Reggie Bush isn't a particularly good player. He's certainly not the game-changer we saw in college (or didn't see if we lived on the east coast and went to bed before 2:00 am). And he's definitely not worth the millions of words that have been dedicated to him in Saints preview capsules this summer.

I mention Bush, by the way, because he's a good example of why the NFC South can't be trusted. Records and statistics aside, the casual fan has heard of way too many of these guys.

Think about it this way. If you haven't watched football seriously since 2003, you're thrilled that the Panthers are starting Jake Delhomme at quarterback, that consensus Freshman All-American selection Reggie Bush is playing for the Saints, and that the Falcons just traded for Tony Gonzalez. If you have watched, you know that Delhomme is the worst starting professional athlete in sports, that Reggie Bush got outrushed last year by Michael Bush, and that the Chiefs won exactly nothing with Gonzalez despite the fact that he wasn't old . . . yet. Picking the NFC South to make any noise this year is like picking Larry Johnson in your fantasy draft. You might as well call your team the Rip van Winkles.

All this brings me to why I'm picking the Tampa Bay Bucs to at least contend for the division title. Unlike faux-sleeper Houston, who brings arguably the best receiver in the game and an up-and-coming running back to the table, Tampa Bay would absolutely shock people. They're the ultimate sleeper! Reading their roster just put me to sleep!

Laugh if you will, but I'm picking the Bucs to outwin the Saints and Falcons by two games and give the Panthers a run for their divisional money. It's not as sure a bet as Jon Gruden coaching the Broncos, Vikings, or Bills next season, but it's close.

-GM